Chefette – Fourth Date

So I had bitten the bullet and had agreed to go to chefette’s place for a catchup.

It was a little awkward given the messages we had exchanged earlier. We watched a couple of movies together, he was being a little stand offish and was not really connecting physically like we previously had. When we went to bed, we got talking about the messages.

He said he was irritated about how I could ‘flip’ and described me as erratic which has made him ‘wary’ of me.

I explained that I was also irritated that he had not been communicative as I had expected. I explained that after two calls Friday and a text message that I would have expected a response sooner than he had provided. It made me feel that he was not interested in me. So this explained why I had lost interest as I was mirroring his apparent loss of interest.

He repeated that he didn’t have mobile credit and that I was making incorrect assumptions. I assumed that he was allowed to use his parent’s phone – he said his parents don’t like him using their phone. I said that the only reason I was making assumptions is that I was getting no feedback or information from him. Now that he had explained himself and corrected my assumptions I was more comfortable in his feelings toward me.

He accused me of guarding my emotions and prematurely disconnecting from a person when everything got too hard. I said this was unfair, I did show that I was keen through the phone calls and text message. The only reason I wanted to disconnect was his unresponsiveness.

He asked why I had agreed to come over given that I was adamant that I had lost interest. I said that I was giving him the benefit of the doubt and I owed it to myself to hear his side of the story before making a break.

He said that he understood where I was coming from, but I don’t think he truly got it. I think that he is one of those people that just doesn’t get the whole return communication thing.

We did have a very pleasant night – we slept in till 1:00pm the next day (a little short of the last date – but still a mammoth 18 hours). Our parting hug and kiss was the most intimate yet and we both agreed that we would catch up again… I’m not entirely satisfied that he truly understood my position but we shall see what the fifth date brings to the table.